Goot en tog! (Just kidding): The Only Thing We Have To Give Him Is Our Hearts

September 7th, 2015

Family and friends,

I love each of you! I feel such an outpour of love and support from you as I log in to email on P-day. Thank you. :)

We had several Street Displays over the last few weeks. At one Street display, I noticed an older man in a wheelchair. He was parked right in front of Netto (a grocery store) which happened to be right next to our little display. He had been sitting there for a few minutes, so I decided to walk over and ask how he was doing.

He looked at me with a grin on his face and said, "I know who you are. You're from Utah!" Haha, I love it when people say that. I smiled and told him that I was from Oregon. His grin went away after he realized he guessed wrong and then he looked sad all of a sudden.

I asked him simply how his day was going. He told me that he was waiting for his wife inside of Netto - she was doing their weeks grocery shopping. As we chatted casually, all of a sudden he took me hand and told me, "You know, I was a Nazi in the War." He then went to tell me how he has experienced and witnessed things that he cannot undo or unsee. This old man was deeply troubled.

As I was listening to him, I had the impression to ask about his joys in life. He immediately looked up at me with his smiling eyes and said, "my wife and music." He told me about how he had quite the singing voice back in the day, but in his old age he lost his talent. I then offered to sing for him. (In the past I never would have offered, but just two weeks earlier, the Elders and Sister Taylor and I gave a musical number at church. My first time singing a solo. I was very nervous at first but I came to learn that singing is another way to bear your witness - to share your testimony through your voice.)

So I quickly called Elder Vogl and Sister Taylor over (they both have voices of angels, I swear) and we sang, "Näher, mein Gott, zu dir." That was such a powerful moment. As we sang to him, his eyes welling up with emotion and he sobbed through all four verses of that hymn. It is amazing to see how God works through us to reach out to His Children.

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A Mission is full of personal progression and growth. But more than anything, my mission has taught me more and more about who Jesus Christ is, what my relationship to him is, and how I can craft MY personal character into that of my Savior's.

During my personal study this week, I came across a quote from C.S. Lewis, who paraphrases what the Lord says to us: "Give me all. I don't want so much of your time, so much of your talents and money, and so much of your work: I want you. All of you. I have not come to torment
or frustrate the natural man. But to kill it. No half-measures will do. I don't want to prune a branch here and another there; rather I want the whole tree out. Hand it all over to me, the whole outfit, all of your desires, all of your wants and wishes and dreams. Turn them all over to me, give yourself to me and I will make of you a new self in my image. Give me yourself and in exchange I will give you Myself. My will, shall become your will. My heart shall become your heart."
(Mere Christianity, C. S. Lewis)

As a Missionary, we have the unique oppurtunity to give everything up to God. To give up television, music, our cell-phones, limiting our communication with our family and friends, giving up our time and post-poning our education and dating. Putting a pause on all of these things for 18 months to 2 years. But it is more than that. God gave me all of those things.

The ONLY thing that I have to give to Him - that WE have to give to him, is our hearts. Our intents for making the choices we make. As our hearts become more in line with Christ and His heart, we are transformed. There is happiness unlike any other that comes as we give Christ our hearts.

Out of everything that we give, Heavenly Father and Christ give us more than we can imagine. I have learned that what I once thought of as a sacrifice (i.e. going on a Mission) turned out only to be a priviledge. Because He has blessed me more than I can ever give him.

Ich habe euch Lieb!

Sister Helmick